Integration, Fusion & Functional Multiplicity
When I went to school, I learned a lot of stuff. Some of it went “in one ear and out the other,” but some of it stuck. The stuff that stuck became a part of my memory bank even when I sometimes forgot. It was integrated into my whole being and impacted the way I saw the world.
Integration
At its most basic level, integration is the processing of information in such a way that it becomes a part of us.
As we heal from dissociative identity disorder, the amnesiac barriers between our parts lower and become more transparent. Our knowledge of our traumatic past grows. We meet our other selves and hear their stories. We learn.
Like schoolchildren, we integrate this self-knowledge into our whole being, and it impacts the way we see the world. Integration leads us to wholeness. It does not always lead us to fusion.
Fusion
To differentiate the process of integration from the process of bringing all alters into one whole, the International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation (ISSTD) uses the word fusion to describe the final integration of alters.
My Beef 😊
Personally, I have some issues with the word fusion because it sounds harsh, as if my parts are welded together like metal on metal. In contrast, twenty years ago (before the word fusion was in vogue), my parts integrated in a gentle, organic way. Although it feels “final,” occasionally one or another part will break off to tell me something or express a feeling, then rejoin the rest of my whole. In my experience, each of my parts is now a part of the unified me.
Healthy Functioning
Integration of the knowledge of who we are is good and leads to healthy functioning. It does not have to mean we lose our multiplicity. Some of us will integrate into a final fusion but some of us will continue to operate in parts. All of us integrate our new self-knowledge into the way we see the world. If we have healed our triggers, grown in trust, built relationships, and become real, we can be whole human beings as one or as many.
Self-Care
Instead of making integration/fusion a goal, focus instead on (1) getting to know and love your parts and (2) healing the symptoms of childhood abuse.
With the awareness that you can have a happy, healthy life as one or as many, attend to what you and your parts need right now. Trust yourself and your parts to lead you to whatever final resolution is best for you.
Invitation
Check out my website at www.lynbarrett.com where you can download my free ebook called DID Unpacked. You can also sign up for notification of the release of my memoir, Crazy? A Memoir (formerly titled Crazy: In Search of a Narrative) and learn more about writing opportunities. Email me or share your thoughts in the comments below. I’d love to hear from you!
Trust yourself.
Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life.
Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.
Golda Meir